Saturday, January 05, 2013

Don't listen to a word I say the screams all sound the same

I stopped at the (in)convenience store on the way shopping this morning and quickly found myself surrounded by about 15 Fred Bear wannabe's. (Thought I didn't know who he was, didn't cha?! HA!)

Why didn't anybody tell me winter was hunting season in Pennsylvania? I've never heard of such a thing! Thank God I wasn't wearing my brown coat, brown pants and party antlers....I would have been bagged and tagged right in front of the doughnut case!

Of course the guys were all in their camouflage pants and coats and it occurred to me that if they all stood together in a big group.................I think you know where I'm going with this.

I almost lost it though when the one guy kept excitedly saying to the others, "I forgot my phone! I forgot my phone!" as if "accidentally" leaving his phone at home had NEVER occurred to him before. One guy said, "Good, that way you won't get bitched at," and another one said, "Yeah, last time we went hunting you brought your phone and had to leave cuz someone got sick."

Wah wah waaaaaaah. I half expected them to start hitting each other up for tampons.

Some times ya never realize how whiney guys are until you're in a pack of 'em.

And it always amazes me about how guys are not the least bit bashful about staring. Me, I glance, glance away. Then if they're smokin', I think "HOLY SHIT!" and will glance again on my way out, all the while acting as if I could give a rat's ass. Guys. Just. Stare. It's like they're deaf to that inner voice that says "Look away, asshole, it's RUDE to stare!"

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