Sunday, January 30, 2011

a little knowledge is a dangerous thing

I'm reading a romance novel and the mother was talking about giving her young son (2 yrs old) chocolate milk. I'm like, "Damn, woman, kids that young can't tolerate cow's milk! Don't be surprised if he gets an ear infection or cold like symptoms!"

A short time later the kid was diagnosed with a double ear infection. WHO couldn't have seen that one coming?! GUH!!

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Thursday, January 27, 2011

i can honestly say i've never had THIS problem before!

I have enough money left from our taxes to get a nice laptop AND still be able to save some money, so natch I wanted to get another sweet lil' Gateway. I've had such good luck with the two I've owned in the last 14 years. Yep, two computers in FOURTEEN years! My desktop lasted NINE of those years. My laptop isn't holding out so well, but that's mostly due to virus problems, not hardware issues.

Anywho, I went to the Gateway site, and saw some of the NV series laptops that I'd like to get. I'd like to spend around $600-700 and get a good repair warranty, also. Alas, you can no longer purchase Gateway computers FROM Gateway, because they really stand behind their products have a new system. ALLEGEDLY, you can purchase their computers online from other sources. I just don't happen to know what they are because every time I clicked on the laptop I was interested in and clicked "purchase online" the message I received was "this item is not available online." So then I'd put my zip code in to see where it was available to buy in a store in my area and there was none. 

Ya got some mad salesmanship skilz going on there, Gateway! Now I understand why you no longer sell your own products.

While I often have no money and can't buy a laptop, I can honestly say I've never had the money and not been ABLE to buy a laptop because the computer company was making it so damn hard for me to GIVE THEM MY MONEY.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Eden not so Pure

I received my first electric bill since buying the EdenPure and I will admit I've entertained serious thoughts of drop kicking Bob Villa's ass.

My "usual" electric bill  is around $60-65. In the winter it leans toward the $65 end, and  my bill has ONLY ever been about $10 more in the winter months. I don't know that it has EVER been $80.

I *thought* our bills were going up 16% so that would add on about $9 or $10, so let's say the high end of $75 dollars. My first bill with the EdenPure was $105 and NOW I find out that our electricity is going up 16% OVER THE COURSE OF THE YEAR, so I can't even blame an extra $9 or $10 on that.

I only use the EdenPure in an enclosed space, so it warms fairly quickly, then I turn it down, and it cycles off and on. And I only use it for about three to four hours every evening.

My furnace is 35ish and the EdenPure is brand new, so I figured if would be much cheaper and more efficient to run than my furnace, when in fact, it's almost AS expensive. Plus, for that price, the furnace heats the entire house, not a single room.

My bill almost doubled, and I have to say I'm very disappointed in the Eden (not so) Pure.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

blah blah blah think you'll be gettin' this? nah nah nah

Here's some stuff that's been on my mind lately. Nothing important, mind you, just all consuming.

I read an interview with that religious chubby cheeked Cameron chick who used to be on Full House. While she readily admitted that she talked to the guys on the show on a regular basis, when asked about the Olsen twins, she said that she "never talked to them, for no particular reason." If that doesn't smack of "I'm crazy jealous cuz those skinny bitches became famous despite the fact that  I was a much better actress than they were," I don't know what does. Free yourself, Cameron chick. Jesus loves it when you tell the truth! Admit you're jealous. If I was on that show, I'd want to smack those brats. Let's face it, they weren't even cute. And "you got it, dude"? How dumb is that catch phrase? Makes "who let the dogs out" sound downright scholarly. Now they're gazillionaire fashion designers, despite the fact that they dress like bag ladies. You have every reason to not like them. Praise Jesus.

I thought about Oprah's stupid article on how she gorged on mac and cheese because she was depressed about a movie failure. This after Oprah's stupid article on how she had made peace with food. Discretion. Use it. For the love of all that's creamy and delicious, stop freaking talking about your weight and food and your latest diets, woman! One time when my husband and I were having sex, I admit I was more excited about eating the chocolate body paint than I was about sexing him, but I would NEVER admit to it in a public forum! We get it, you're fat and you don't want to be. Discretion. Use it.

Then my mind wandered like Moses in the desert. I thought about how my dog won't get up on the bed with me early in the morning when I'm awake and I'm trying to coax her up. She waits till I fall asleep then she nudges me with her nose. I also thought about how incredibly cold a dog's nose is on the small of your back at 4 a.m.


I thought about how I've never been a very good saver, and I keep waiting for a savior  to swoop in and rescue me and allow me to live out my days in wealth and luxury. To that end, I've decided to be realistic. No more scratch off lottery ticket retirement plans. Instead, I'm going to back a winning horse: I'm going to invent something that will make me instantly rich. There are tons of feminine hygiene products, and due to very clever advertising, a ton of females thinking they have stinky cooches. So I decided to manufacture: dick soap. I even came up with a catchy name: Dick Soap. And here's the best part, you rub the dick soap in, but you don't have to rinse it off.  You can get clean and jerk off at the same time! Genius, yes? Best part is you won't smell all girly after you whack off. You just smell clean. Then I realized that guys probably don't spend a lot of time worrying that their dicks stink.

Last but certainly least,  I spent some time thinking about that Ke$ha chick who is always singing about getting wasted, partying and having sex with guys. Why don't sexy singer chicks ever write about the importance of going to school and getting a good education? I guess it's easier to rhyme "blah blah blah" than "bachelor's degree".

Now I'm off to think about about how I love little baby ducks, old pick up trucks, slow movin' trains and why anyone would want to see Octomom having sex.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

everything old is new again

My intent when I wrote yesterday's post about the Harlequin ebook I purchased was not to get my money back. I wanted Harlequin to stop the deceptive practice of putting new covers on old books. You do not put a new paint job on an old car and try to sell it as new.  The consumer has a right to know exactly what they're buying.

I also don't want condescending emails sent to placate me. I want this company that I have supported for over 40 years to know that their current practices are unfair to the consumer, and they are going to lose our loyalty.

I don't care what sort of fancy names Harlequin comes up with for it's reissues, but I do feel that the word "REISSUE" needs to appear clearly and plainly on the cover so that the consumer is able to make an informed decision as to whether or not they want to spend money on that book.

That having been said, I want to thank Eleanor Elliot from Harlequin for her candid response and her offer to refund my money. Had I received that sort of email yesterday, I wouldn't have had written about the issue at all. 

But I read the book, and I will pay for it.

However, I sincerely hope that this issue is NOT just addressed on the website as Eleanor suggested in her comment. It needs to be addressed on the book covers because if it isn't, then I have to believe that my earlier assessment that Harlequin is deliberately trying to confuse the consumer is correct, and I don't want to feel that way about about a company that I have respected for so many years.

Monday, January 17, 2011

time for another installment of .....I'M MAD AND I'M NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!

 <---Oooo! I have this one in my library! What about you?

The other day I received an email from Harlequin books telling me that their "best of 2010 ebooks" were on sale for 25% off.

I purchased a book and was reading it on Sunday. I wasn't liking it too much, so I decided to go on Amazon and see what others thought of the book. I usually don't read reviews beforehand because I don't want someone else's views to taint my interpretation of the book.

When I logged onto the site, I noticed a much older cover for the same book. Lo and behold, I discovered my "2010" ebook was really a reprint of a 1997 book!

It's bad enough that my four sleeves of Oreos have now shrunk to three, but there's no frickin' way I'm taking this!

I emailed Harlequin to complain and check out their little "blah blah we don't really give a shit" response:
"Thank you for taking the time to e-mail us.
Your comments are greatly appreciated. We at take pride in providing the highest quality of service to our vauled and loyal customers. Your feedback is vital to our success. It will help our site to evolve and become more consumer-friendly.
You may check publishing dates on the internet, we do apologize for the misunderstanding.
We are forwarding your comments to our Marketing Division.
If you have any further questions or concerns, please contact us."

Notice what they DIDN'T say? "We feel really bad that you didn't realize this book was a reissue. Here's a credit for the amount you paid."

This is NOT the first time I've bitched to Harlequin about this issue. They reprinted a slew of Christmas books one year and passed them off as new, when in fact they were all at least ten years old.  Now I buy the majority of my Christmas books at used book sales.

I know that I am not the only consumer who has gotten duped in this same manner, so I can only assume that HARLEQUIN IS DELIBERATELY MISLEADING THEIR READERS.

If a book is a reissue it needs to state that clearly on the cover.

Yes, I can "check publishing dates on the internet," but the point is, I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO. When I receive an email talking about 2010 books, then they need to be 2010 issued. I should be able to tell, simply by looking at the cover that is it an old book.

 So yes, Harlequin, I do have a "further concern": when do you plan to stop screwing over your loyal readers?

Saturday, January 15, 2011


THEY WON  31-24, after being down by 14 at the half!!!!


Friday, January 14, 2011

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Wow! Their computer savvy boggles my mind!!

I recently purchased a show on Amazon's Video on Demand and when I played it back, the sound was AWFUL. I explained to the monkeys in tech support that I had the volume on my computer turned up as high as it would go, and the volume on the Amazon Unbox as loud as it would go, but I STILL had a hard time hearing it, even using earplugs.

Check out this genius "tech support" they gave me after I explained all  of the above to them:

Here are some troubleshooting steps:

— Check the sound controls on your Amazon Unbox video player.
— Check the main volume and wave volume of your computer, which will override the volume level on the video player.
— Verify that the mute option is not turned on for any of these volume controls.

Ya know those moments in life when you feel like you're just talking to yourself? You are.

Friday, January 07, 2011

they just don't make 'em like that anymore

Our furnace died last night.

Not to worry, though, because our repairman immediately stepped in and performed furnace CPR.

Our baby has reached the ripe old age of 36 and I can honestly say that in all the years that we've lived in this house--28 to be exact--we've only ever had to have her repaired once before last night. And BOTH times, including last night--THANK YOU, LORD!!--it cost us less than $100 to have her repaired. Strict HIPPA laws (and the fact that I'm blonde) prevent me from going into too much detail about her condition, but I know she needed a new fuel filter and the magnets that have something to do with lighting the flame needed cleaned.

And that's why, when it's time for us to release her to that Great Furnace Repairman in the sky, I'm going to buy another Rheem furnace!!!


Sunday, January 02, 2011

his hair was slick and he was slicker

I've read romance novels since I was a wide eyed innocent in high school. Advance ten years later--I said TEN YEARS, DAMN IT!!---and I am still a wide eyed innocent who is getting incredibly sick of some of the same plots being used over and over and over again. I think what angers me so much is that in any romance writing book you read, they tell newbies NOT to used tired plot lines and yet the established writers blatantly do just that and it's acceptable.
First plot line I'm sick of: the hero who suddenly "inherits" a baby and looks to the first female he finds, be it his assistant, his neighbor or his DOG WALKER--worst EVER variation on this plot--and gets her to take care of the child for him. Then he falls for her, but I'm never sure he's in love with her for her or for the free, built in babysitting services.

Second plot line I'm sick of: wealthy CEOs whose daddies suddenly decide they need to marry and have a child immediately. First son to do so will be chosen to run the family business! These story lines usually run in series books because there will be three or four relatives competing against each other to "win". Now we all know that bedding the first chick we see and knocking her up is a well known way to prove your business savvy, and we all know that the best thing a father can do is force his workaholic child to marry and have kids so he can ignore both his wife and his kids, but enough is enough. Just once, I want a HERO--a REAL HERO--to say, "Mind your own damn business, Dad, and while we're on the subject, run your own damn business. I'm striking out on my own because I have a mind of my own." But no, they all kiss Dad's ass by running out and sleeping with a stranger. Oh, excuse me, my bad. A beautiful sexy stranger. Because again, we all know CEO's never marry uglee women.

Third plot line I'm pretty damn fed up with: he was rejected by her when they were younger, now he's as wealthy as a Beverly Hillbilly and she's as po' as Jed used to be before he was out  shootin' at some food and up through the ground came a bubblin' crude. He sweeps in to "save" her when really he's hell bent on destroying her and along the way--ooops!--he falls in love with her all over again. Awwww. Can he get her to fall in love with him again? He can if he treats her cruelly enough! You'd have to be a pretty sick bastard to nurture your anger for years and years, just waiting for the perfect opportunity to destroy someone you "love", but such is the path of a determined stalker romantic. And if he gets her fired from her job or kicked out of her apartment along the way, hey, it's all good, right?

you're not wearing THAT, are you?

Dress pants
I was walking down the aisle at Dollar General the other night when a guy stepped out in front of me from a side aisle.

I immediately gave the universal sound of surprise "whoops!" and stepped back, and when he crossed in front of me, I glanced down at his pants and almost burst out laughing.

NOT dress pants!!

At Christmas, I gave Mr. G two pairs of flannel "sleep pants" which we women appropriately call 'PAJAMAS'. Along with the pants I gave him this warning--the very SAME warning I gave him when I gave him boxer shorts: "If I EVER catch you wearing these in public, I WILL BURN THEM!!!!"

The reason I almost burst out laughing when I saw the dude at DG is because he was wearing the exact same pants I gave my husband and I thought, "Hmm, some lady just lost that battle." Worse than the pants, though, was the fact that Mr. No Fashionsense actually tucked his t-shirt into the pants as if that somewhat legitimized them and made it an "outfit". IT. DID. NOT. He just looked even more ridiculous.