From Doonesbury, Roland Hedley's Tweets:
"I'm about to sneeze. Thoughts?"
On the Michael Jackson funeral coverage:
"Close call here. They ended "We are the World" before I could jimmy open my gun closet and blow my brains out."
"Bereaved billions stay home to ogle open coffin of beloved pedophile on live TV. Earth about to get a little bit creepier.
""Service" begins. Millions being paid to work actually watching TV. Loss in global productivity today = GNP of Mexico."