Sunday, July 19, 2009

Paul Blart: He Sucks

I watched "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" and it was typical Kevin James fare in which he tries to convince us that even though he's really overweight, he's got great physical prowess. No. No, he doesn't.

Once again, I'm not buying a guy his age outfoxing and out maneuvering SEVERAL guys much younger than him. I've seen too damn many of these movies lately.

There are times I like to watch a movie just for the fun of it. It's like some nights you want to eat steak and some nights you just want a Hot Pocket. So I didn't go into this thinking it was going to be on the grand scale of say "Roots." But geez, people.

The only promising part of the storyline, the internet dating, was treated as a great idea for about three minutes, then totally forgotten. The best scenes surrounding the dating didn't make the final cut, and they never even had him meet anyone. His mother and daughter knew he had a crush on the chick at the mall, so why even waste our time with this if you're not going to follow through? And yes, ONCE AGAIN a not so good looking guy gets the hottie girl. Does it ever happen any other way? Do we ever see him get the type of women he really deserves? Ask Bob Newhart, he'll tell you a resounding "NO".

I give it a one star out of five. If you like "middle aged fat guy outwits young punk" movies, then this is for you, as is the Gunsmoke movie in which a seventy something James Arness outfoxes a bunch of young Indians.

1 comment:

BBC said...

A seventy something James Arness in good shape just might be able to outfox a bunch of young guys. Never underestimate old crafty guys that have learned a lot of things over the years.

As for Mall Cop, pretty sure I'll never see it, prefer to get my skinny ass out camping.