Tuesday, June 30, 2009

v-a-c-a-t-i-o-n in the summertime

Many of you who read my blog on a regular basis know that I have lots of children. In these tough economic times, one needs to .....economize. Hey, it's not my fault I'm not more creative! I couldn't afford a damn creative writing course because one of the offspring needed her allergy meds. If she'd stay away from our eight indoor cats like I've told her repeatedly, she wouldn't need those meds. Like Grandpa used to say, "Shake it off, shake it off."

Anywho, I try to save money by taking the offspring on seven day trips instead of one big, money sucking week's vacation. Remember last year's trip to the fair? Sure the kids bitched when they found out it was a diabetes fair, but not one of them turned down their free refrigerator magnet listing the symptoms of diabetes OR the laminated card showing their glucose level. I think that's way more fun than going to an actual county fair and getting cotton candy, candy apples and diabetes.

This year I planned an equally fun trip for our first day trip. (Stupid allergy meds!) A neighboring county opened a brand spanking new water filtration plant and was giving free tours.
At the end of the tour--took us longer to get out of the car--I said to the guide, "So this water is perfectly safe to drink?"
He said, "It certainly is. Would you like a free sample?"
I yelled, "KIDS! Get those empty gallon jugs out of the back of my car!"
We came home with sixteen one gallon free samples. Won't have to buy water for a month. See how easy it is to economize and have oodles of fun at the same time?

I'm already thinking ahead to the Christmas holiday season. I have my eye on a sweet little Blue Spruce that will look lovely in the corner of our living room. So three times a week I have one of the offspring sneak over to the neighbor's yard and feed it Miracle Grow. It's going to be grand when we sneak over there with our chainsaw. Ok, with the neighbor's chainsaw that we 'borrowed' from his unlocked shed.

Now I've given this a lot of thought, and I think if I follow my budget very closely, lie to my mother about the cost of her groceries and have the offspring steal from the fountain at the mall, I should be able to afford that creative writing class. Keep your fingers crossed!

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