Monday, August 25, 2008

but you and me, all we want to be is lazy

You know you're getting lazy when you think someone is stealing your stuff and you don't even want to get out of bed to check.

Last night za Dog was in one of her barking moods. Around two o'clock she started barking rather frantically and she left my room and went into the living room, and threw herself against the front door, as if to say, "Anybody coming in or going out, is going through me."

I fell back to sleep and around 3 a.m. something woke me up and I heard what I thought was someone closing the door on our shed. It's not that far from the house and it has a very distinctive sound.

Now, I'm laying there, thinking, "Oh crap. I think someone's in the shed. I guess I have to get up and turn on the light and look. But I think I left my slippers in the living room and the light switch is all the way downstairs. Ooooo, why does God hate me?!

And what's really in that shed? Three or four year old lawn mowers that I've been bitching about replacing and an equally old weed eater. By the time I get downstairs they'll be long gone. Screw it. Anybody dumb enough to steal that junk can have it, and I'll have a legitimate reason for buying new. Maybe I can get one of those riding mowers! Wooo hooo! Now I hope somebody IS breaking into the shed!"

When I got out of bed, I told Mr. G that I heard someone near the shed and he said, "Did you get up and turn on the light?" Yeah, uh huh. Schure I did.

After I left for work in the morning, Mr. G checked all around the shed and the yard and we decided that it was actually an animal hitting against the door since nothing around the shed had been disturbed. He called me at work and said, "Luckily, nothing was stolen." Yeah, luckily. Sigh. Goodbye, riding lawn mower. I hardly knew ye.

1 comment:

BRUNO said...

Yeah, sometimes it gets to the point that I start looking when the dog DOESN'T bark! I learned a lesson once the hard way. Went chargin' out, gun in one hand, mini-mag light in the other, when the dog was raisin' hell.(I now use a much LARGER, brighter six-cell!)

That SKUNK was better armed and defended than I was that night! He "fired", and missed me!

But the DOG wasn't quite the same for a few days afterwards. And he didn't SMELL so good, either....!