Tuesday, July 08, 2008

i spit on your grave...er, "lot"

Ahh, the Church never ceases to amaze me. We received a letter recently saying they were going to charge $10 per grave per year for maintenance. Now we don't have graves, but we do have lots. Who the hell charges on lots?!

So I called and said, "Ya know, we've decided to be cremated so we don't need these lots anymore and we'd like to get our $ back."
She said, "Would you like to just donate that $ to the Church?"
When I stopped belly laughing five minutes later, I said, "No, I'd like my $ back."
She said, "We'll have to deduct $100 from that for care."
I'm like, "Whoa. Care of what?"
She said, "When you first bought your graves, you paid $100 on top of the price for perpetual care. We'll have to take that back."
I said, "Ok, maybe I'm not understanding you correctly because I thought "perpetual" meant "for the life of" something. That being the case, why are you asking for $10 a year per grave now?"
She hesitated a moment, then said, "Well, that was how it was originally set up, but they need more money for care now."

There's gonna be a LOOOOOOT of pissed off parishoners in that Church. When I asked her how she could charge us ANYTHING because we never really had graves on the lots, she said, "Well, we still have to trim the lots."

What a bunch of shit. They'll take my $100, and turn right around and re-sell the lots and get another $100 from some other sucker.

5 comments:

BRUNO said...

Look at it as a "yearly PROPERTY-tax, on your FUTURE real-estate"!

Hell, I'll only charge you FIVE-bucks, for that little strip of earth between me and the missus' spots.

Fit? Why, of COURSE you'll fit!

I only want the LEGS, and those HEELS---the ol' lady has the "OTHER-stuff" covered.....!

BBC said...

Well, the world is full of suckers and christians like to take advantage of that.

*Goddess* said...

Yes, I found that out, Billy;)

*Goddess* said...

I'm getting cremated. I won't need any ground, Bruno.

Besides, one of the offspring will probably knock me off the table and I'll end up in the Hoover anyway;)

Anonymous said...

AMEN, Sister, AMEN!... Wouldn't it have been interesting to hear how some of the sisters who taught us in grade school explain how the moral compass wasn't broken on this one?...but then that wouldn't be fair... better to hear a priest explain it... the poor nuns were always getting the short end of it.