Thursday, December 20, 2007

soon it will be Christmas Day

Grrrrrrrrrrrrr. Mike South gave out his "awards" today, and I'm protesting my so-called "win". He pretty much lets it be known that if if JimmyD had his funny bone reinserted, I wouldn't have a snowball's chance in Hell of winning. I guess I should just be happy he didn't bring TimCase into it again. LIKE HE DOES EVERY FREAKING YEAR!!!! Why doesn't he just say it like it is?
This is the "if anybody else gave a shit about their blog, you'd lose" award. AND furthermore, I hate when he labels my stuff "chick humor."
If it was "chick" humor, he wouldn't get it. Besides, I have more guys reading my site than women. My friend David suggested the term "chick logic" until I informed him there's no such thing.

One more reason I won't let Mr. G own a gun.

I'm afraid I'll ask him to turn up the heat and he'll start shootin'!

I cried my way through Prancer again this morning. Damn.
I can't help boo hoo'ing every time I see Prancer join Santa's team at the end of the movie. I think, "he WAS Prancer! That spunky little chick was right to hold on to her beliefs even though everyone thought she was loser!" Then I bawl some more.

My name is Goddess, and I have a dirty little secret: I started watching it when I was bored, and now I just love "Reba". The guy who plays Van is hilarious, as he struggles to understand all the women around him. And I just love Melissa Peterson. She's so cute and bubbly and funny. Her Fla La La La Lifetime bits with Carson Pressley are hilarious. I like the one where she picks him up and says, "I need to wrap you. I'm going to regift you."

Today I watched The Simpson's Movie and Evan Almighty. Evan Almighty wasn't horrible, but sadly, it was predictable. And also, for a comedy, it wasn't very funny. Wanda Sykes had the best line in the entire movie. When Evan (as Noah) raised his staff and the animals all began calmly boarding the Ark two by two, she said, "What in the world? I can't even get my cats to use the litter box!" I enjoyed seeing all the animals and it was cute the way they kept following him around. I'm probably in the minority, but Steve Carell is a lot like Jim Carey in my book, and I don't mean that in a good way. He does the same physical shtick in every movie, and it's like you've seen one of his movies and you've seen them all. One part of the movie that made no sense was when Evan told his wife he wanted to build a "boat," then began working on the Ark. He had one section started before he told his wife the truth. I'm a wife. I know wives. There's no way on God's green earth that he could have lifted that first huge beam into place without her running out of the house, screaming "What the Hell are you thinking?! You said a "boat," not a monstrosity!!"
I was a bit perplexed by something that happened in the movie. I thought God's way was to provide us with the ideas and we had to make the stuff happen.
God provided Evan with the wood, the land to build the Ark on, the tools and even the "Ark Building for Dummies" book. Makes me wonder why God just didn't build the doggone Ark Himself. Yes, God comes off as a tad controlling in this movie.

The Simpson's Movie was pretty good. I loved the first part when Homer, Marge and the kids were sitting in the theater watching an episode of Itchy and Scratchy and Homer stood up and said, "I can't believe we're paying to see something we get on TV for free! If you ask me, everybody in this theater is a giant sucker!" Then he looks into the camera and says, "Especially YOU!" Then they ran one of those annoying FOX ads at the bottom of the screen during the movie, and it said, "Yes! We even advertise our shows in movies!" What I've always loved about the Simpsons creators is that they're not afraid to poke fun of themselves and their network. Another funny part was when Lisa was furious with Homer. She said, "I'm so angry!" and Marge said, "You're a woman. You can hold onto it forever."
Funny, but after all these years, I STILL cover my face during the Itchy and Scratchy segments. They are way too violent.

Did you ever wake up with a song in your head? Usually I find it's connected to a
dream I had, but this morning, I woke up with that old song, "The End of the World" running through my head. Mostly the line, "Don't they know it's the end of the world? It ended when I lost your love." Then I kept thinking about it, and I realized I HAD that song on an old Ally McBeal soundtrack CD.
Vonda Shepard did a really good version of it.

Speaking of music, you know what annoying Christmas song I haven't heard yet this year? And I shouldn't even mention it or I'll start hearing it all the time, not UNLIKE those freaking Christmas Shoes, which I seem to be hearing on a daily basis now. I haven't heard "Christmas Wrapping," that repetitious song by The Waitresses.


B.T.Bear (esq.) said...

Ahhhhhhhh I love Lisa Simpson! She's my special girl. I love her!

Happy Christmas!

H2o said...

I wish I had time to watch tv.

Mushy said...

Merry Christmas cutie (at least you are in my mind - having never seen your mug before)!

You know Mushy is ending soon, but I'll be on The Silverbacks and still lurking around here.

Hope you have too much to eat!