Wednesday, December 05, 2007

a snowball's chance in hell

<--Check out these HIDEOUS shoes from that Christmas movie I was telling you about. (I know I'm obsessing, but the woman is DYING, for Pete's sake! That's no excuse for ugly!) If I was dying and one of my offspring brought me these shoes, I'd say, "Honey, I may be dying, but I haven't lost my fashion sense!"

<--Now THESE are a great pair of Christmas shoes!

I wasted a huge portion of the morning playing this. My best score was only 2050 on Level 3. That damn Santa has screwed me over for the last time! HE'S GOING DOWN!!

Tampax is grossing me out with their new slogan "Use your period for good." They talk about how girls in Africa can't attend school when they have their periods because they have no pads. You know damn well Tampax can send these women their product and use it as a charitable tax write-off, and yet they're trying to guilt us into buying their product with this ad campaign. Sorry, Tampax. For years now, I've been using my period for evil and I intend to keep on doing just that.


Mushy said...

Try this can learn a little sumpin!

BRUNO said...

Wonder what kinda angle Trojan will "cum" up with, now, to "shame" the MALE population into the same trap?

Naw---I don't wanna know!

Maybe Oprah can make pads for 'em outta all that old, dirty money she has packed in her puss....!

*Goddess* said...

Learn?! Mushy?! LEARN?! I frown on learning...

*Goddess* said...

Maybe it's my imagination, but companies don't seem to play on men sympathies, Bruno. I don't see any prostate cancer ribbons or tennis ball companies promoting testicular cancer awareness.

Anonymous said...

Bruno, Goddess is most certainly correct. Single males with disposible income are targeted by high tech gadget companies and car manufacturers in advertising, but it's all under the guise of fun competition with other men. And all the ads are fun and entertaining, right?

When it comes to women with disposible income (married or not), they prey on her sympathies for children and her inate insecuries about bonding with other women. We are targetting with the most negative, hideous msgs about ourselves, our gender, our bodies, our values, our socialist ideal (whatever they are suppose to be vs. what they really are or aren't), and we guilt tripped like every ad agency is run by the Jewish Mothers of America. Oy ve!

Is it any wonder I can't stand the thought of even trying to bond with uber women, or want children, or care what other vicious, judgemental women think of feel about me as a person and fellow human being? I could care less. I see Prada anything on a woman and my eyes immediately start to glaze over. I see the small mountains set in platinum on their left hands and I tune them out, I hear their conversations at Starfucks with their screaming bratty children jumping all over the furniture as they ingore the noise and bad bahaviour, and I want to go postal on their MiniVan Majority asses.

How's that for fun and entertaining truth in advertising???


PS: I gave up on tampons this year. I now how an alternative that rocks, and it was purchased from a small indy outfit online that I read about on a blog.

The Future Was Yesterday said...

And one reason you are targeted so much, is they know you still blubber over a 200 yr old terrible Christmas movie the 40th time you see it.:)

BRUNO said...

Well, I THINK I agree. But when it comes to thinking---hell, I quit trying to do that!

But I see everyones' point, when it comes to "milkin' it for all it's worth", in advertising.

Maybe MEN should become more aware of their own "Achilles heel"---the prostate. It's a real "bitch" to be blindsided by something that makes you "ten feet tall and bulletproof" when you were a desirable YOUNG man...!

(Not as funny as usual? Hey, even THIS asshole has his "funky" days!)

Lin said...

Didn't the last Pope make his exit showing off his red shoes? Maybe he started an exit trend. I plan to go out in a nice pair of fuzzy red bedroom slippers. Hell, I got half way to a party once before I looked down and saw my pink ones still in place. We just kept going and I went barefoot instead.