Saturday, December 08, 2007

later on we'll conspire, as we dream by the fire

I have to share this because it's so damn funny. This is what Stacey wrote in my Christmas card: "Get your freak on so you can get your holiday lay on, Girl!! All the best to you and yours at the trailer park this holiday season, Goddess. May there only be one or ten, calls to your hood by hott cops to take your drunk, nude ass out of your fellow neighbors' rockin' holiday trailer bashes." Damn, she really takes the time to WRITE STUFF. This is what I write in my cards, "Happy Holidays!" and then I even abbreviate Mr. G's first name to make the card writing experience even shorter than it already is. Thanks, Ma'am! I love it.
Bugs sent me a really funny one, too. It's called "Christmas Road Rage," and it shows Santa and his reindeer flying passed a jet.
Santa to Jet Pilot: "Move it or lose it, Fly Boy!"
Jet Pilot: "Yeah, shove it up your chimney, ya freak!"
Santa: "You gettin' your frequent flyer miles at the airport lounge?"
Jet Pilot: "Hey, nice suit--your momma dress you like that?"
Santa: "I got your package right here!"
Jet Pilot: "Looks like your over your weight limit there, jolly boy!"

I found the Hott Cops story that ran on the news!!!
The Red Bluff TV reporter did a great job and the officers were really nice. I think the guys handled it really well considering the whole thing probably blindsided them:)
Go here and hit "video on demand" to the right of your screen. Then go to "news archives," and "December 5th, 2007". It's in the "weather segment." WEEEEEEE!
If some web savvy person could tell me how I could save that to my computer, I'd really appreciate it if you'd let me know. I'd love to have a copy of it saved.

I CANNOT BELIEVE IT!! Remember I told you how Mr. G's bro-in-law wanted him to "lend" him the weed eater and lawn mower we got from his mother? Yesterday, his sister says, "I'll pay you $50 for the weed eater, and I want the lawn mower, too." Her balls are GINORMOUS! My husband said, "Why wouldn't you take that $50 and put it towards a NEW weed eater? Why do you have to take what little I got?" and she walked away from him. What a total ass.

I received a hospital bill for some tests/blood work Mr. G had done, and it was about $75. I usually have my bills figured out a month in advance so anytime something unexpected like this comes in, it has to wait. They were very generous about the payment options, though: pay in full in ten days. Period. After about three weeks, I paid half of the bill, then three weeks later, paid the other half. Two days after I sent in the second payment, I received a letter from the hospital saying that the balance (second pymt) was "seriously past due" and that they were going to turn the bill over to a collection agency if I didn't pay immediately. Imagine my joy when I received a letter today from the hospital soliciting donations for their "charitable work". The letter said, "No one is turned away because of an inability to pay for healthcare services. So whether the need is for equipment, education or to enable a patient to receive a treatment or essential screening, donations truly do make a difference." I guess the feeling is that if you don't have money, it's all good. If you DO have coverage, pay within the alloted time or we'll fark you over with your creditors. I think that if the hospital spent LESS money on latte shops, extravagant fountains and glass elevators, they might HAVE enough money to pay for their own equipment without asking the public to loosen their already overly-tightened pocketbook strings. Unlike the hospital in question, I have to pay whatever taxes the county commissioners tell me I have to pay. I can't just make a donation to the city and say it's enough, so my 'extra' cash isn't all that 'extra'.


BRUNO said...

I wouldn't sell 'em for FIVE-HUNDRED EACH, just because!!!

I'm a real "prick" in that way! Why? Mainly just to piss-off someone who thinks they can "out-prick" me!

It ain't about the money---it's the principle! You tell Mr.G to "stand-firm"!

I could've put that better, probably---but then again, maybe not...???

Anonymous said...

Glad you liked the card. I wrote out all of my cards on the front counter as my husband slaved over endless computers in for service like a chicken with his head cut off one day a few weeks ago.

I'm a bitch, so if I were related to Mr. G's sister, I would chase her down a hall with scissors in my hand after she finally made me snap... Oh, wait... I already did that to my OWN 'sister'.


BBC said...

I don't know crap about Hott Cops as I don't watch TV, but whatever.

Yes, hospitals should serve everyone, but it's all very complex. They are expected to take care of what is nothing more than bottom feeders so often neglect the middle class working people.

Sometimes I'm amazed at how well the bottom feeders are cared for over the rest of us after they screw their lives all up with drugs or booze. Have you ever noticed that?

When I see a bottom feeder sporting around in a six thousand dollar powered electric chair they got for free while I get around in a used three thousand dollar rig I had to work for I have to wonder about this fucked up system.

What are your thoughts on that?

*Goddess* said...

Oh, he's not giving them up, Bruno. He's every bit as stubborn as she is. Besides, I'm not springing for new ones come summer:)

*Goddess* said...

Stacey, remind me never to piss you off...;)

*Goddess* said...

My husband made a comment in a similar vein, Billy. There's a group here that helps unwed mothers. They solicit donations and the girls live there full time. They watch the babies, while the mothers go to school and get a free education in some sort of skilled work. One girl because a nurse. My husband said, "So because these girls got pregnant, they're getting a free ride with their education. Because my daughter was smart and didn't get pregnant, she's "penalized" by having to pay for an education for years to come."