Monday, December 10, 2007

gone away is the bluebird


A local church is having "Breakfast at the Manger...$4 for children, $6 for adults."
I said to Mr. G, "How many seconds before somebody spills pancake syrup all over Baby Jesus?"

Mr. G is forever "testing" me about this doggone dog. He said, "If someone offered you $100,000 for Holly would you take it?"”
I said, "What do they say, Honey? 'If you love something, set it free.....for $100,000'."

Just when I think I've heard it all, along comes this asshole...
With competition like this, I can smell that Mother of the Year award!

Ahh, fitting justice. Mr. G found out that they were having a buffet during the Christmas party at the
home where his mother is living now. He did a little digging with the owner of the home and found out they would be serving stuff like potato salad, meatballs, cookies, and all sorts of goodies.
Of course, the siren song of "free food" was a temptation too strong for him to ignore.
(My husband would be more apt to have an affair with Rachel Ray than he would Pam Anderson.
He prefers great food over fake ta-ta's. No matter how over inflated they may be.)

The party was from 3-5, so Mr. G had it all figured out. He would arrive at the home around 2:15 to make it appear
like he was really interested in visiting the oldsters. Then he would eat around 3ish and be home in plenty of time for the Steeler/Patriot game at 4.
He came home at 4:10 and yelled, "Not even a HINT of food! They had this stupid program, then Santa came and they were passing out presents, singing songs and getting their pictures taken with Santa!"
At which point, Female Offspring #1 immediately said, "Why would old people want their picture taken with Santa?"
Female Offspring #7 said, "When I had my picture taken with Santa, I peed on him. Did Grandma pee on Santa?"
Male Offspring #7 said, "Holly bit Santa. Did Grandma bite Santa?"
Oy. I said, "Perhaps, my dear, the TRUE MEANING of Christmas is not in the free food, but in friendships and sharing?"
Mr. G said, "Nah, it's the free food."

7 comments:

BBC said...

The link was interesting.

I have to agree that free food is always great, I welcome and am thankful all that flows to me.

But I also welcome and am thankful for the friendships and visiting

The Future Was Yesterday said...

Re the link....Hubby better be damn careful when/if it comes time to pay for the divorce!

BRUNO said...

Breakfast at the manger, $4-to-$6 per head, eh? Must be in that "new, revised edition" of the Bible---don't recall readin' about that before! Draw those heathens in!

Except they should change it to LUNCH---most "real-heathens" work nights---except for the winos---and don't "do" breakfast! That's for the NORMAL people...!

*Goddess* said...

Lots of area restaurants have "Breakfast with Santa," Bruno, so I think the churches are feeling the need to compete. "Breakfast with Jesus"...LOL!

*Goddess* said...

IF there's a divorce, Dan'l?! Hell, if the idiot has any sense at all, he won't even marry this chick. I'm just glad it was taken away from her. If she's willing to sell this child for a lousy $200 to get married, God only knows what she'd allow others to do it to KEEP her man.

~Fathairybastard~ said...

The quickest wat to a mans, or the baby Jesus' heart, is through the stomach. Ok, it goes stomach, wallet, penis, thought the last two can be switched depending on who yer talkin' about. Free food, free cooze... OK, I'm thinking. DON'T RUSH ME DAMMIT!

~Fathairybastard~ said...

OK, I'd go for the cooze. There's a Jack-in-the-box on every block.