Thursday, October 25, 2007

9 out of 10 dentists prefer this post

Ok, I officially HATE the music they play during UFC Fight Night. It's downright creepy. It sounds like they're expecting a showdown between Jesus and Satan.
AND I hate those stupid "Fuel for Life by Diesel" commercials. They're stupid. First it shows the guy with the open shirt fake running and being fake out of breath. Then it shows the guy with the open shirt standing in the rain, like an ass. And not a freaking hair on his chest. Why, oh why do they think perfume/aftershave commercials have to be "artsy"? It rarely works.

Oral Roberts has said "the Devil is not going to steal ORU"! Yes, because it's one thing for his son to possibly steal from the church donations, quite another for the Devil to steal his school!!

My boss was listening to The Waltons the other day, and I was in the next room listening because I was super bored. Ep, the sheriff, was up for re-election and some smooth talking younger guy was trying to oust him from his position.
He said to John Walton, "I've spent 20 years of my life fight crime here. Chasing crooks, birthing babies, rescuing people from fires."
Chasing crooks? It's friggin' Walton Mountain. How many crooks would they see on Walton Mountain in 20 years? I'm guessing two or three, at best.
Yeah, he's so worried about losing his job that a few scenes later it shows him outside the front of the sheriff's office with his feet propped
up and his hat pulled down, sleeping in broad daylight, aka "chasing crooks", no doubt.

The offspring were pissed that I refused to take them to the Halloween parade Tuesday night. I gently explained that I put in a 10 hour day and I was exhausted. I illustrated my point by screaming, "I'M TOO DAMN TIRED TO GO TO THAT STUPID PARADE!!"

Last night when I came home
from work, I found a jar of
<--this on my dresser.

9 comments:

H2o said...

Welcome back! I do belive I would have rolled laughing on the floor upon seeing the jar. To funny!

The Future Was Yesterday said...

"Oral Roberts"
Is that the same school that used to be called "Two Queers Named Bob?" Just wondering.

BRUNO said...

Got that "Tired Old Ass Soak" from The Vermont Country Store, didn't ya'?

Glad you're back! Was afraid you had slipped in the same pile of shit I did a few years back, and suddenly became OLD, like TWO OR THREE of the rest of us...!

Lin said...

Now that was just downright sweet and thoughtful of your kids to buy that bath soaky stuff for you, especially since the parade was no longer an option.

*Goddess* said...

Yes, they did, Bruno. Along with some maple syrup and Necco wafers.

*Goddess* said...

Yeah, somehow I don't think "sweet and thoughtful" is what the kids were going for, Lin:)

Mushy said...

Something about the words "tired old ass" that is so repulsive to me. I mean, I can see a wrinkled old ass sitting all bunched up in water...gross! That's why I shower!

BBC said...

LOL

Hey!! I'm 64, you are only as old as you feel. I can out work most folks my age.

Don't let yourself feel old. Take a short nap and hit life again. Hugs.

Dustin said...

I think I could use some of that tired old ass soak myself! LOL...actually I just need a hot apple cider vinegar to pull the toxins out and totally relax me and I'll be good. Think I'll pick some up today when I go get more cat food!

Welcome back to blogging, missed ya! :D