Wednesday, August 08, 2007

read this while humming the Star Spangled Banner, please

Hi, my name is Goddess and I am unAmerican.

I know this because, today, when I was in the grocery store shopping for overpriced crap to feed my family, I passed over Stephen Colbert's Americone Dream Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream for the ever popular Banana Split. I actually bordered on treasonous when I lovingly held Willie Nelson's Peach Cobbler, but I settled, people. I settled for the politically impartial Banana Split. But, I did HOLD Americone Dream for several seconds. That should count for something.

And may I just say that when you're lusting for a banana split and can't get to a Dairy Queen near you [or you don't have your teeth handy], nothing is better than eating all of the banana split ingredients pureed into ice cream.
Sign me,
UnAmerican in PA

5 comments:

SpongyBones said...

You should have bought Willies, could have helped an old hippie our with his tax debt ... now what kind of an American are you for Goddess SAKE!

*Goddess* said...

Taxes, my ass, SB. It would have all gone to his maryjuana habit.

BBC said...

Actually, I think that food in this country is pretty cheap. I can't make it as cheap as they sell it to me for.

I live in a state where most food hasn't got a sales tax on it. What ticks me off is that there is a sales tax on beer.

Hello fucking hello?... If I'm pouring it over my frigging Cheerios it's a frigging food item.

Even if all I have is a beer for lunch it's still a food item. Am I right or wrong?

BBC said...

Oh, and I made a nice berry cobbler the other day, it's going very nicely with the ice cream.

Life is uncertain, eat dessert first. Hell, eat it for the main course, that is what I do. :-)

*Goddess* said...

Aren't necessities tax free, Billy? ;)