I'm sure you all know that tomorrow is a solemn High Holy Day for me. Yep, first day of school.
I didn't realize until yesterday how sacred a man's grill is. I stopped at C.P.'s house on the way home for a quick burger. He was bitching about how hard it was to clean the grill and I, oh so innocently said, "If you put aluminum foil on that, it would clean up in a snap. Just toss the foil away after each use." Damn. From the male uproar that ensued, you would have thought I suggested we shoot a small child for sport. How was I to know all that caked on grease "adds flavor"? Personally, I think it's more carcinogenic than flavorful, so there!
Thank God Stacey relentlessly badgered me to install Avast virus protection. I clicked on a site the other day and the virus alarm went off, scaring the piss out of me. The alarm went off not once, but three times. I was virtually piss-less at that point, BUT virus free. I love the Avast message that immediately pops up after it tells you what your computer has been exposed to and says, "There's no need to panic." LOL! They know me well. Ok, maybe Stacey didn't relentlessly badger me so much as she suggested I get it. Oh, well. Same diff.
I was reading an article about iPhone bills this morning. One Pittsburgher's phone bill was over THREE HUNDRED PAGES long. They had to deliver the damn thing in a box because it wouldn't fit in the mail. Ahhh, the irony. iPhones are supposed to make things to much simpler. Why aren't these people getting their bills ONLINE? We know they have internet service.
The plastic surgery show with the doctor from Beverly Hills creeps me out no end. On a recent commercial a chick is standing there topless with the doctor and her S.O. looking at her. The S.O. says something like her body is a work of art and the doctor says it's definitely a Massarotti body. That's fucking sick. She's standing there while they discuss her body like it's theirs to do whatever they want with it. Gawd, how I wish they'd come up with an operation to make guy's cocks bigger so women could drag them into the doctor's office like they're nothing more than a piece of meat. If a woman wants to have her breasts enhanced for HERSELF, that's great. But too many of them do it because the man in their life aren't satisfied with what the women have. I just wish women could turn the tables on them and demean them by reducing them to body parts.
Our local paper has a medical column and one person wrote the following: "Answer this letter for me and my fellow seniors. Constipation is a daily topic of conversation...." Sigh. I have soooo much to look forward to. SB, you better not have a shitty comment on this one.
I was also reading about bank tellers in Orlando who are required to bake cookies before the bank opens so they can give their customers freshly baked cookies each day. I have a better idea: screw the cookies and lower your damn fees instead.
Why has it taken so long to come out with colored laptops? I'm lusting after a nice purple or shocking pink one, and I don't even want a new laptop.
I like the song "Umbrella" by Rhianna, but I don't like the way they screw it up by adding all that rap garbage at the beginning.
My boss had the Hour of Power on this morning and Rev. Schuller (Jr.) was interviewing Robin McGraw, wife of Dr. Phil. He started his interview by holding up her book and saying, "I started reading your book last night, and my wife started reading it this morning..." PROCRASTINATORS!! Services start at 7:30 a.m. Nothing like waiting till the last minute.