"Hi ho! Hi ho! It's out to weed I go...."
Alex has informed me that today is World Naked Gardening Day. Oh HELL no!
Coincidentally, I think it's also Keep All Your Curtains Drawn Day. Ok, it's not, but it *should* be!
Yesterday I had the JOY of watching my niece's son. He is four years old and so incredibly...let's see...how can I put this so it has a positive spin to it? He's so inquisitive! Our conversation went a little bit like this....
Cody: "What's your dog's name?"
Me: "Because we got her close to Christmas time. I thought it would be nice."
Me: "Because people use Holly to decorate at Christmas."
Me: "Because they're crazy and they have nothing better to do!!!! Hey, how about we watch a DVD?" (Notice how cleverly I changed the subject.)
Cody: "I want to watch Ed, Edd and Eddy."
Me: "I don't have that on DVD."
Me: "I don't buy a lot of DVD's. I rent them if I want to see something."
Me: "Because I made lousy choices in life and now I'm poor! Okay, are you happy now? I freaking CAN'T AFFORD Ed, Edd and Eddy on DVD!"
Me: "Hey, how about a sandwich?" (Yet another clever diversionary tactic.)
Cody: "I want peanut butter and jelly."
Me: "Ohh, sorry, honey, I don't have peanut butter."
Cody: "Can we go to the store and get some?"
Me: "I can't. I don't have any money in the house."
No way was I going into that 'poor choices' thing again.
Me: "We like to make our own peanut butter. Here's a handful of peanuts and two slices of bread. Knock yourself out, kid."