Tuesday, April 10, 2007

i'm picking up good vibrations

I remember when Female Offspring #1 was little, around bedtime, Mr. G always used to say, "You're one tired bird."
And she'd say, "I'm a tired bird."
I can totally relate because I am one tired bird this week, and it's only Wednesday. I've been doing an hour of Taebo and a half hour
of recumbent bike five days a week. Because my ass is dragging by the time I get home from work, I had been getting up an hour and a half early before work and exercising. Well, I did this Sunday and I really wanted to sleep in.
So Sunday afternoon I came up with this brilliant idea of doing an hour of Monday's exercise Sunday night,and then I'd only have to do a half hour in the morning. I've been doing that each day. So I did two and a half hours of exercise on Sunday, then one and a half hours Monday and Tuesday. You know, it's kind of like going
to Mass a during the week and counting it as attendance on Sunday.
At this point in time, however, my ass is FARKING DRAGGING.
I was ok with it, though, because we agreed to take off walking the dog Wednesday and
Thursday. NOW Mr. G says he wants to walk tonight and take off Thursday and Friday. UGH.
The upside is that after just one month of upping my Taebo time, my bp has gone from 146/97 to 117/82.
This is due entirely to the fact that I'm now too exhausted to get stressed.

So Larry Birkhead is the father of ANS's baby. Nailed it! Me and everybody else on the planet.
Zsa Zsa Gabor's husband is probably crying right about now.
No, not because he's stuck with Zsa Zsa instead of a baby that might inherit millions...oh, wait, that *is* why he's probably crying.

Here's a search string I noticed on my stats the other day, "which hole in a girl's vagina do I put my cock in?"
If you have to axe yourself this question, you are NOT ready to have sex. REPEAT: YOU ARE NOT READY TO HAVE SEX.
Now if you'll excuse me, just to be sure I haven't been missing something all these years, I need to look for the other holes in my vagina....

4 comments:

Fathairybastard said...

What was that again? Which hole? Jesus, who the hell sent that? And reading this just exhausted me to the point of needing to go to bed. Good job.

Shrink wrapped scream said...

Jeez, girl - respect! I did buy a running machine, couple of years back, but just dusting it makes me light-headed. That dog-walking thing is enough for me..

Hey, that guy you mentioned - looks like you've stumbled across my ex, God lurv 'im.. (shudder).

*Goddess* said...

It was a search string in my stats, FHB. If you don't have them, you need to get them. They're hilarious to read sometimes.

Well, hell, I gotta respect anybody bold enough to buy a running machine, SWS! I *wish* the dog walking thing was enough for me, but it's more stopping and sniffing every few feet than it is walking.

Mushy said...

It's in the vagina? Damn, I've been way off!