Only Britney Spears. Have you seen the new commercial for her perfume, Fantasy?
"Once upon a time there was a goddess and a hunter.
She was beautiful and he couldn’t help himself.
There wasn’t a single part of her that he didn’t want to touch.
She was leaving soon on a goddess world tour
So he did something crazy and they lived happily ever after."
The "something crazy" the hunter did? He shot her in the back with an arrow, felling her like so much venison.
Yayaya, I know it was a "magic love" arrow, come on, the hysterically funny/ironic thing is the twit that shoots her in the back is K Fed.
FYI, advertising folks, if you want people to sucker for all of this love and fantasy stuff,
it would have been smart to re-shoot the commercial using a male model. One that doesn't look like a greasy haired bum.
Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later. Dan Davis said I'm a lousy stalker.
Holy shit. I haven't even STARTED yet, and already I'm lousy!
But I've been thinking about this, and here's the deal: I blame Dan.
I started stalking South after I saw vids of him
having sex, so Dan is just going to have to pony up a DVD of his "greatest hits,"
if you know what I mean. A gal needs something to...umm..."work" with.
Ok, go to this site, and watch the intro to Dirt. Then tell me what kind of
work Courteney Cox has had because she doesn't even look the same anymore.
To me it looks like she's had lipo to her face, work on her jaw and neck,
and there's a whooole lotta airbrushing goin' on. She's looks much better than she did towards the end of Friends.
I got the sweetest Christmas card this week from Da Buglet aka Bugs' Male Offspring #1.
He drew me a picture of a Christmas tree and lots of presents that hopefully he's planning to send me.
I put the card on my fridge, right next to a Christmas card that my Male Offspring #7 drew for me in kinneygarden last week.
It shows me on the roof hanging Christmas lights. Then he wrote the words, "DIE!! DIE!! DIE!!" then
it shows me falling off of the roof and laying on the ground with my severed head several feet away from my body.
Then he wrote the words "AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!!"
I have no idea what he's trying to say there but he drew a really THIN version of me, so it's a keeper! It's going right into my Brag Book!
I was in the yard the other day walking Holly and two Jehovah witness chicks stopped to talk to me.
They haven't been back since I made that crack a summer or two ago, about Jesus catching fly balls.
I honestly thought that maybe they weren't doing this part of the ministry anymore,
because I never see them in any of the local neighborhoods anymore. But maybe they've just given up on me and my bad neighbors.
The one lady says, "We have something for you," and she started walking towards me.
Holly stepped forward and started to growl under her breath. Hey, ever since the kids
took her to church to get baptized, Holly has been a staunch Catholic!
Then I heard the other lady say, "Oh, my. Maybe we better come back some other time." Yeah, maybe.