Sunday, November 05, 2006

the spirits are ruthless with the paths they choose

Had to go to the ER yesterday when my blood pressure dropped dramatically. I thought I grabbed my birth control
patch--slapped it right next to my nicotine patch and my diet patch--but apparently I grabbed my husband's blood pressure
patch by mistake. Damn. I just hope this major clusterfuck doesn't come back to haunt me nine months from now.

From the "where in the world is George W. Bush file": during a speech on Friday,
Bush mentioned the 9.11 attacks, which "...took place in New York, the Pentagon and Lancaster."
Annnnd the people of Shanksville just shook their heads.

Speaking of the dudes that installed my water heater--ok *we* weren't, but *I* was--they were incredibly scared of Holly. My innocent little Sweetie Pops!
She was outside when they arrived and as soon as they stepped out of the truck she went nuts. The one said, "Is that a Lab?"
When I told him she was a Lab, he said, "Wow. It's unusual for a Lab to bark like that." I said, "She's a very good watch dog."
And she is.
I'm always quick to add that in case anybody gets any dumb ideas.

Keith writes: "Dear Goddy, may I suggest you stalk Dan Davis via song?"
LOL! I'm trying to *win* him, Keith, remember? Not scare the hell out of him.
I could probably write a song for him, though, cuz lots of words rhyme with Dan. Like Dan,
tryptophan, Kazakhstan. Holy shit, this song is practically writing itself.

Well the people from Life Alert called me at work yesterday afternoon. Male Offspring #6 was
visiting his grandpa and apparently he kept pushing Pap's emergency response button.
They threatened to call the police and report him if it didn't stop.
I said, "Lay off! My son doesn't know any better."
The man said, "Oh? He's a small child? How old is he?"
I said, "He's only FOURcoughcoughcoughteen."

I was watching The Soup yesterday and they showed clips of Tyra Banks dressed up as a man.
Previously they had shown pics of Tyra impersonating a fat person.
What's next? Tyra impersonating someone with talent?

Rev. Haggard bought methamphetamines but he didn't use them? He solicited a gay dude,
but never availed himself of anything but a massage?
That's like me saying I bought a cop calendars but didn't use them for fresh jilling material.

I wish they made spam messages more interesting. I don't give a damn if Joyce uploaded new software and
I don't give a damn about cheap @IAGRA and I sure as hell don't care if their "store is my cureal." What the hell is a "cureal" btw? A cure all perhaps?


frhe sjgg said...

glad you are back home and the e.r. thing is atemporary blip. Scary !

Tyra doesn't do it right -- in order to really know how a fat person feels she should have simply added on 50 pounds and walked around for a week.

Adding 150 for one afternoon and them complaining about it is absurd. It isn't typical.

She took the extreme -- and all she could think of was how horrible it was to be ignored !

Geez, the problems that woman has could be counted on the head of a pin. Grow up !

Goddess said...

LOL'ing at the "being ignored" thing. That's like a "worse case scenario" for a model;)