Wednesday, October 11, 2006

dont look now there's a monkey on your back

I am totally depressed today. Don't ask me why. I just am. Ever have one of those days? You can't blame it on any one thing.....sigh. It just is.

I get so sick of these news shows that depict people who make minimum wage like we're freaks.
Like Jane Goodall is crouching in the shadows, watching, waiting, researching our every move.
Yes, Goddess earns fucking minimum wage. As if that hasn't been painfully obvious all along.
Those stupid news shows always go something like this....
It shows the family trailer from the outside, faux wood siding and all. The camera hones in on cracked window panes and broken wooden porch steps.
A "Welcome" sign sways in the breeze, hanging from one nail.
Then the camera focuses on a broken down Monte Carlo in the driveway and the news twit says,
"Let us now observe the minimum wageigans in their natural habitat: poverty." The camera crew moves inside and they
show the kitchen table. It's complete with a bowl of macaroni and cheese--minus the cheese--one apple
sliced into 25 pieces and a big bowl of plain, white rice--minus the white.
Mother always says something like, "I've learned to make meal stretchers, often times leaving out the expensive meat.
Last night I left the vegetables *and* meat out of the stew and we all had a delicious bowl of hearty broth. Then I froze ten gallons for the upcoming winter months.
We're so grateful for our bounty."
After dinner it shows the kids on the floor playing with their only toys: an empty cardboard box and their imaginations.
Dad, wearing his stained wife beater muscle t and worn jeans, watches from the musty, threadbare couch and
says, "The kids are happy with what they got. Hell, they don't know any better.
You can't miss what you don't have."
And I know he'll say that because some jackass *always* says that. You wanna BET you can't miss what you don't have?
I have never had a skinny ass body, but you can rest assured there isn't a day goes by that I don't miss it.
Then they wrap the whole segment up when some twit in the family--usually Mom--waxes poetic and says, "We might not have much, but at least we have each other."
Whoop de fucking do. Try paying the electric bill with your son and see how far ya get.

While it's ever so sweet of Brad and Whatsherface to adopt kids from foreign countries, with Madonna
possibly following suit, I have to ask, what about the many, many American children stuck in foster care?
Wouldn't it be great if one of these rich celebs gave THEM a "better" life?

I don't like to imply that the news anchors are INSANE, but yesterday when the plane went into the building in New York, the
chick on CNN actually said this, "Any time something like this happens, we note the significance of the date.
We just figured out that tomorrow would be sixth anniversary of the attack on USS Cole in the Port of Yemen."
Like one has anything to do with the other!
We all know why this REALLY happened. Because Friday is the 13th!
When something like this happens, you almost wish you had a quarter for everyone they interview that says, "I heard a loud crash...."
If I lived near the chaos, I gotta admit that once the danger was over, I'd be out there with my
camera snapping pics of all the hottie cops cuz they're distracted by the pandemonium.

For the past couple days, I've had something on my mind that's really bothering me.
I keep trying to push it down and not think about it, but it nags at me constantly.
Last night I woke up about three a.m. and instantly started thinking about it again.
I realized then that I have to address what's bugging me.
Who the hell reads Rex Morgan, M.D.?! The same people who read Mary Worth and Prince Valiant?!


Mushy said...

I could have concentrated more on your thoughts had I not kept singing "got a monkey on your back" along with Ronnie VanZant through the whole thing. You need to watch your music theme headers more closely!

The best crash sound bite I heard was that "...the propeller had bends and scatches on 3 of the props, but none on the 4th one. The question is did that happen before or after the crash?"

Da...they hit a freakin' brick building! When do you think it happened?

Oh yeah..."...and the debris all fell to the ground." Where else?

Anyway...I still say wife swap and the 50 grand is your only way out. Go ahead, pick up the phone!

Goddess said...

It was listening to the George Michael version of Monkey on Your Back that got me started on that header in the first!

And yeah, I forgot about the dumb debris comments...ugh.

LOL! I love the propeller comments. It's amazing what they come up with.