Thursday, September 14, 2006

i get so emotional baby everytime i think of you

Ooooooooooo. NOW the police in the Bahamas are calling Daniel Smith's death "suspicious."
Apparently Anna Nicole's lawyer Howard K. Stern was also in the hospital room when Smith died. Police said they think they know how he died and are awaiting toxicology reports.
Interesting since the police originally said the death was NOT suspicious and Stern said drugs and alcohol played no part in the death.

The space shuttle lost another bolt in space. Perhaps the space shuttle was built by Kia?
The space shuttle is starting to remind me of the Starship Enterprise.
It was built to travel the galaxy and the least little bit of trouble and it shimmied and shook like my Rio with a bad air filter.

I watched "Under Fire" last night on Court TV, and my feelings are mixed. While it was interesting to watch new situations,
I'm not at all wild about seeing police officers get shot in the line of duty. I just don't think it's "entertainment"
and I really don't think those sorts of videos belong on tv. Why give other assholes ideas?
Although the officers were not fatally injured in this show, I don't think I'll watch it again

Stephen Colbert needs to STOP doing his "Formidable Opponent" segment. The one *big* problem I have with
the show is that it's too much Stephen and "Formidable Opponent" is Stephen debating with Stephen. UGH.

Whitney Houston is divorcing Bobby Brown? Who knew it would come to this?
I thought surely it would end with a drug overdose or gunfire. I never expected divorce.
I did have to laugh when one website said she was at the Ella awards looking "healthy." Umm, no.
Slightly less haggard, perhaps, but in no way did she look "healthy".

Well it's official. Britney Spears is the proud mom of another baby boy, who arrived by scheduled C section at 2 a.m.
Now I ask you, IF you could schedule the time your child would be born, why the hell would you pick 2 a.m.?! Noonish works for me.
As a matter of fact, none of my offspring were born before noon. Oh, a couple of them tried, but I squeezed really hard and held 'em in.

Jay sends this timely joke since the toy world is due to unveil a NEW Tickle Me Elmo
(I know I'm quivering with anticipation):
There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the
Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.
Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she
reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 AM.
The next day at 8:45 AM there is a knock at the Personnel
Manager's door. The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant
about the new employee. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the
whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind
schedule.
The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself,
so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the
line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory
floor and they're really beginning to pile up. At the end of the line
stands Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's.
She has a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of small
marbles. The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of
fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the
little package between Elmo's legs.
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter.
After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together
and approaches Lena. "I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to
keep a straight face, "but I think you misunderstood the instructions
I gave you yesterday..."
"Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles.


And that's my two cents.

6 comments:

Ron Southern said...

Sometimes you're so cool I trip on my own giggle!

Goddess said...

I'm gonna put that on a t shirt....lol;)

Mushy said...

I must be gettin' old and slow - didn't get the "test tickles" until the second read! I'm slippin'!

Goddess said...

The marbles weren't a clue? lol....

Mushy said...

I think I dosed off somewhere in there. Sorry.

Fathairybastard said...

Long build up, but a decent finish.