Friday, July 07, 2006

crawling into bed with me

I was over on the Bravo website watching some of Kathy Griffin's vids and in one of them
she was buying Ryan Seachrest a gift cert for a mani-pedi. The Asian woman who was filling out
the gift cert info said, "Ryan Seachrest? Is that Miss or Mrs.?" and Kathy said, "Miss will be fine."

Ok, what I'm about to say might sound biased or bigoted or prejudiced--I'll have to get South to send me an explanation
of that whole controversy again--but WHATEVER. Yesterday morning I sat down to watch a show with Male Offspring #7 called "Hi-5."
First of all, may I just say it was annoying? Secondly, they had an Asian female on the show and here's the thing:
I couldn't tell if she was a child, teen or grown woman!
All the people on those kid's shows talk in those goofy, kiddish voices, so it's sometimes difficult to know their age.
[Unless they're in their 30's and still on Beverly Hills 90210, that is...]
Case in point, I nearly fell off my chair when Bugs told me Steve, the used to be Blues Clues dude was an adult.
Plus, because so many Asian women are small, it's hard to tell their
age until they get in their 60's! So, if anybody knows, clue me in, will ya?

I haven't heard this much unbelievable bullshit since Michael Jackson tried to convince us he slept with Lisa Marie.
First the dairy industry said drinking milk would give you "strong bones," and yet, there are more and more cases of osteoporosis in the United States. Then they tried to convince us that "drinking milk helps you lose weight" . NOW they're saying that drinking milk will help prevent type 2 diabetes! Now here's the funny thing about the study: the dairy industry is saying that COMPARED TO SODA DRINKERS, milk drinkers have less incidences of type 2 diabetes. Wow. Why not just compare milk drinkers to whiskey drinkers and tell us milk helps keep our liver healthy? Let's compare milk drinkers to people who ONLY drink water and see who comes out on top. The sad thing is that people are going to take the dairy industry comments at face value as so many of them have when it comes to the whole milk/calcium issue, much to the consumers regret.

Ya know the show that looks incredibly funny to me? It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. Has anybody seen it?
I have to work a couple nights next week and I hope it's on. I'd love to watch it and see if it's as funny as it seems.

Damn it. I finally get to see Kathy Griffin's new season of Life on the D List and didn't
I miss the first 15 minutes of the episode with the police chief! Ok, now Bugs mentioned this to me and
now I've been reading about it on the internet, too, about how Kathy is going on Larry King Live to talk about how she caught her ex-husband Matt stealing from her. ALLEGEDLY she caught him on camera going through her purse. I'm not buying that at all. Who the hell carries $72 grand in their purse, which is the amount they keep mentioning? Besides, IF he was a thief, why would they still be living together?
Another thing that didn't make sense was that in the article it said Kathy "told" Larry--past tense--yet her show was pre-empted the other night.
So how could she have told him when the show is supposedly live?
I have to say though that I think she's fighting a losing battle in trying to keep her marriage together.
Matt looks bored out of his mind and now he's doing HER HAIR! Give me a break. Why can't she do her own damn hair?
Surely the man has more talents than that? A few years from now how happy is he going to be
that his "job" was waiting on his wife hand and foot while she works on furthers HER career?
Sadly, I see hardly any physical affection between them this season and they seem more like "buddies" than spouses.

You know who really pisses me off? That damn Dog Whisperer. He makes everything
look so friggin' simple. "You want the dog to listen, you tell him to listen." "You want the dog to follow,
so you be Pack Leader." Pack Leader, Schmack Leader. And then in big print you see this disclaimer, "do not attempt these techniques
without consulting a professional first." DUH. It showed him going in to put a leash on a vicious dog the other day,
and one minute later they both come out smiling. Ahh, the miracle of video tape. It gives 'em time to clean up the cuts.

Wow. The "Strangers With Candy" movie has FINALLY been released.

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