Monday, June 05, 2006

you got me going crazy you turn me on

Do you know those annoying people who try to sound like the singer on the radio when they sing? Hi. I'm one of those annoying people.
Yes, I think I sound exactly like Madonna.
Yes, I think I sound exactly like the male lead singer from The Fray. And yes, I think I sound like Bobby AND Whitney.
In reality, I sound more like that William Hung dude that got laughed off of American Idol, but that doesn't stop me from singing.
I don't mean to be nasty, but the first time I saw him on A.I, I thought in all seriousness, "Wow. It really takes
guts for a mentally retarded person to try out for Idol." I *honestly*
thought he had Down's Syndrome.
Overtime Hawg wanted me to work for her this Saturday and I said I would, but in turn, I wanted next Saturday off. Usually she works Friday for me so I can be off eight days in a row, but I figured "fug it" this time. If she's taking my Saturday, I want hers. So she calls me at work today and starts in with her usual sob story. "Is there any way I can work another day for you other than Friday? I made this appointment with a doctor six months ago and if I don't keep it, he can't see me for two more months." Blah blah as she continues with the rest of the same story I hear every time. It's always a doctors appointment that she made a long time ago.
When she finishes with the drama, I said, "I didn't ask for Friday off. I told you I wanted you to work Saturday for me."
She said, "Oh." And then after a few moments of silence, "You mean you want me to take off Friday then come back out on Saturday?"
I said, "Yeah, the same way I have to take off this Friday and come out on Saturday for you."
Now *here* is the interesting thing. When she asked me to work for her on Saturday a couple months ago, SHE is the one that suggested
she would work on Friday. Now don't you think you'd consult a friggin' calendar before you make arrangements to fill in for someone? Secondly if this
appointment was earth shatteringly important as she made it out to be, don't you think you'd remember when it is? At least a general idea?
I *know* that's gonna kill her because she takes off to her cabin on the weekends and I'm guessing she wanted to leave on Friday. Having to work Saturday is going to mess that up all up for her, and not like she can come back with some plausible excuse as to why she can't work Saturday now.
I gave up a ton of weekends last summer to her and I don't intend to do it again this summer.

Good news for Dell owners. Dell is adding 1000 tech support people to improve their tech support. Bad news is not one of 'em speaks English.
More people to talk to that ya can't understand. In other words, they'll fit right in with the rest of the Dell Tech support monkeys.

Apparently they've made quite the historic find in an attic in Maryland. They've found letters from Mrs. Abe Lincoln about her husband.
I believe one of them said, "Abe has become a big pain in the ass since he became President. It's blah blah blah honesty this and blah blah blah honesty that. Honestly, I wish he'd spend as much time between my legs as he does kvetching about honesty."

ESPN has cancelled it's reality show called Bonds on Bonds. Smartest move ESPN ever made. Can you imagine following Barry Bonds around 24/7?
What would we see? Him looking at himself in the mirror? Him singing his own praises? Him taking "vitamin B12" shots? Ugh.
It was cancelled because of control issues. Who couldn't see that coming?

Speaking of sports, apparently some chick has been stalking former baseball player Bob Uecker. Uecker is accusing her
of sending him presents and following him to different cities. At his age, he should be grateful for the attention....

I turned on the radio Sunday morning on the way to work and a song called "God is My Friend" was playing. After it finished the announcer
began to talk about how Jesus was our friend, and I thought, "Sure He's my friend. When He wants something. But does He ever email?
Does He ever just pick up the phone to say 'hey''?" He's on my buddy list, but do I ever get an IM?
Nope. Zip. Zilch. Nada. He doesn't even send me those annoying forwards about Himself.

I bought a pair of ear buds. I'm not wild about them. I prefer the big, honking Koss padded headphones with the extra long cord.
But what I thought was neat as far as the earbuds go is this: one has a little red band on it and one has a little blue band on it.
I guess that's so you don't try to jam them both into the SAME ear. Clever, huh?

Thanks, Jay, for letting me know the song I was looking for was Hourglass by Squeeze. My skimmers know everything!

I'm sick of hearing about the bird flu, but here's my plan anyway. I say we talk about it constantly, stirring everybody
up in a frenzied fear, BUT DO NOTHING until it hits in full force. Then scramble like mad to come up with a solution.
Oh, wait. That's not my plan, that's the gubment's plan...for a lot of emergencies apparently.

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