Tuesday, March 21, 2006

wanted dead or alive

I like the new ad for a dental adhesive. It shows two people in the back of a cab, both probably 50 or 60ish.
The voice over says, "One of these people are wearing dentures." From the minute the commercial begins they start sucking face.
Then the voice over says, "Can you tell which one it is?" Hell, I can't even tell which one of them
has TEETH since they have their tongues shoved down each other's throats the entire time.

I *think* I may have actually gotten a different haircut this morning.
I'll let you know in a week because as we all know no matter HOW I get my hair cut,
it looks the same about a week later.

Damn. I read an article that says that women who list soaps and talk shows as their main type of tv entertainment have
lower scores on memory, cognitive skills and attention tests. Now when I can't remember where I put my keys, I can blame "those damn soaps."
No word on how watching too much COPS will affect me, but I'm willing to risk it.

MSN is running an article on how to end your dates. I find, "Get the fuck out, you stupid loser!"
works best. Unless you plan on ever seeing him again.

So now I'm thinking this whole thing with Chef and South Park
is just a ruse to garner ratings. They showed a commercial for the season premiere and it's still Chef with Issac Hayes' voice.
If it is, that's pretty pathetic. Almost as pathetic as the show has been.

What am I like cursed when it comes to blog stats? I've gone through three blog stat programs and now my current one is suddenly defunct. Sigh. For a stat whore, this is really KILLER.

This is what I love about the people who read my site. When they see I'm having trouble
coming up with topics, they jump right in and help out. Thank God for them because you know I don't like to keep up
with the news. Cuts into my soaps and COPS time.
Bugzzz sends this story and adds, "Now, according to things that I have seen since, like the news "ticker" on CNN, or MSNBC, or one of those other alphabet channels...I can't remember which one...anyway....the man killed the boy because he "entered his meticulously groomed lawn". What in the fuck is wrong with people?????"
Ya know, back in the day when I was young, men just used to run out onto the porch, shake their fist and scream at ya if you rode their bikes through their freshly cut lawn. The worst that could happen? The stress might give THEM a heart attack. Now they kill ya. My how times have changed.
All of a sudden, "I'm calling your mother and dad!" doesn't sound too doggone bad.
BTW, whatever happened to using attractive people for news anchors?
Here's another link to the story. Amazing what causes some people to snap.

Of the no smoking ban, Eric writes: "Actually, for a long time it wasn't known that smoking caused cancer.
Cigarettes were actually advertised as good for your health, and there's
no reason to suppose that many politicians didn't buy into this like
much of the public. By the time it became known that smoking was bad for
you, it was too difficult politically to try and totally ban it, easier
to just tax it. Only more recently, as smokers became a minority, did it
become feasible to start restricting where people could smoke.

I agree it's overkill to ban outdoor smoking. The rationale for banning
it in public interiors is to protect workers such as waitstaff from
second-hand smoke, although ideally that could be voted on at the
individual workplace. But that rationale doesn't apply outside."
I know that the government didn't ADMIT that they knew smoking caused cancer for a long time,
but I honestly don't believe that they didn't. How can you take a foreign substance like that, put it into your body day in and day out, constantly inhaling smoke into your body and think it's healthy for you? I think a large part of our problem in this country is
that WE (blindly) BELIEVE what the government and the FDA is telling us.

Lisa sends this joke: "The world was stunned by the news, this morning, of the death
of the Energizer Bunny. He was six years old. Authorities believe that the death occurred at approximately
8:42 PM last evening. Best known as the irritating pink bunny that kept
going and going and going.
"Pinkie" as he was known to his friends and relatives, was
alone at the time of his death. An autopsy was performed early this morning. Chief medical
Examiner, Dr. Dura Cell, concluded that the cause of death was acute cardiac
arrest induced by sexual over-stimulation.
Apparently, someone had put Mr. Bunny's Batteries in backwards,
and he kept coming, and coming and coming....."

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