Saturday, March 04, 2006

i couldn't find a killer hook

I was reading an article on MSN about the bird flu. It covered the myths and truths of the bird flu. One of the facts was that anyone who was died of the avian flu had direct contact with the birds or their droppings. In one instance, a man had his bird in a cock fight and he manually sucked the mucus from the bird's nose so that it could fight better. Now that's what I call one HELL of a dedicated cock sucker.
Another concern is that the virus will easily become transmittable from one human to the next. While they haven't found this be the case yet, I sincerely believe that the lower Bush's approval rating goes, the harder they'll work to find this missing link.

Gawd, ever since I found out there was a ton of heroin in Pittsburgh, I worry about Female Offspring #1.
Every conversation now ends with, "Stay away from that heroin. Drugs are bad, m'kay?" So the other night when I went through this spiel, she said, "But other drugs are ok, right?" GUH. Excuse me a minute while I yank out my hair.
It's one thing when your child is in your home and you can see what they're doing---well when
their bedroom door is open. EVen then they can get away with a ton of shit. (Just talk to the mothers
of those Columbine shooters....) But when they're in another city, you have to rely on their
phone voice and overall attitude, which isn't a whole hell of a lot to go by.

It's amazing sometimes how low people will go. Bugzzz sent me this story about a father who convinced the judge that he was going to give his kidney to his sick son. The father then took off for parts unknown leaving the poor child behind. This guy was really smart, though. He stayed at his mom's for the first set of tests and reported in to a probation officer. When those tests were completed, he returned to the jail. When he was released the second time after he gained everyone's confidence, he took off. When they find him they ought to force the little bastard to give up his kidney.

Kelli writes: "Goddess, do you have children?"
Damn. Evidently I do not talk about my offspring ENOUGH. Yes, Kelli, I have 16 offspring.
BUT I consider ALL of God's children MY children...........I'm just grateful I don't have to feed and house the little boogers.

A big to Richard Freeman for sending me EIGHT--count 'em--EIGHT adult DVD's!!
I think he accidentally sent me a cooking DVD by mistake though.
But I'm hoping I can find a good Boston Cream Pie or Coconut Cream Pie recipe
in this "Interracial Cream Pies" DVD...

I've come to the sad conclusion that I mustn't shower much on my week off. Yesterday afternoon, I brought Holly in from outside and she jumped up on the bed and looked at me as if to say, "Let's take our afternoon nap!" I said, "You sleep, I'll be back in a minute. I want to take a shower." As soon as I said that, she heaved a loud sigh and gave me the sad puppy look. I said, "I'm not going anywhere! I"m just taking a shower." She continued with the sad puppy look and hung her head over the edge of the bed. Good grief. I was guilted into taking a two hour nap after my shower just to prove to her that I wasn't going anywhere!
But what a FABULOUS nap it was. I had GREAT sex dreams!!
I have to admit, I have THEE BEST sex dreams. I always feel my orgasms just like I do when I'm awake.
AND it takes no effort on my part.

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