Friday, December 30, 2005

they say i'm nasty but i dont give a damn

I spent a good bit of Thursday driving from one end of the trailer to the other.
Why? BECAUSE I COULD!!
God bless the person who invented the Hoveround.

I think it's time for me to resurrect Goddess' Book Club. Read "Why Men Love Bitches" and
we'll meet back here in a week to discuss it.

Ok, I'm totally stuck on the song "Pon De Replay (Hey Mr. DJ) by Rihanna.
Not that it's any sort of a deep song, but like "Hollaback Girl" it's got that great driving beat to it.
Actually the lyrics to Hollaback Girl border on the ridiculous at times--especially the banana part--but the beat is addictive.
AND I'm stuck on Hey Ya from Outkast all over again. And Don't Cha. Poor Holly had to watch me dance to that several times yesterday.

I was watching some tv with Mr. G last night and while flipping channels I came across an Everybody Loves Raymond from the
first season. Deborah told Ray that she was turned on by him and by how he took care of her and the family, and they started kissing and making out.
Lordy, how THAT show did a complete 360. By the end of the show Deborah was a complete bitch and a screaming shrew, who was always turning down sex.
I resent shows that portray wives like that. There are SOME married women who actually ENJOY SEX. I should know.
Some of us even like PORN. (GASP!!)
It just annoys me that wives are always portrayed in a negative way. Of course by the end of that series, Raymond was totally whipped by his mommy.
It was downright creepy the way he pandered to her.

Mr. G gave me a glass of wine the other night before bed and it wasn't long until I remembered why I rarely drink. Besides the falling asleep within fifteen minutes thing.
I woke up around 4 am and was wide awake. While alchohol initially makes you tired, when it wears off you're wide awake with a vengence.

I saw some of Being Bobby Brown's Christmas show. Damn.
It's sad how far gone Whitney is. They showed some of her younger (healthier) pictures.
Her daughter is thinning out and she's becoming prettier as she ages, but Whitney looks like an old crackhe---well, I won't say it.
Let's put it this way, if she can afford the expensive drugs, as she says, she needs to start buying them then.

I discovered something very interesting today. Guys do not like it when you use their tools for things other than "tooling."
My friend C.P. picked up a few tools he left behind when he tightened something on my furnace a few days ago. I thought I had cleaned his screwdriver throughly,
but apparently there was speck of dirt on the bit. He showed it to me and said, "Why does my screwdriver bit have dirt on it?" I said,
"I used it to dig a hole outside." He looked at me like I just admitted to bludgeoning my parents to death.
Then he repeated what I said like five times and each time his voice got louder, and each time he emphasized different words.
"You used MY good RECHARGABLE, CORDLESS screwdriver to DIG a hole?!"
I said, "Yeah, it was cool you should have seen it! It went right into the frozen ground. And I would have used the Phillips head but you didn't have one."
Ummm, apparently that wasn't a good thing.
I'm not even going to tell him I used the claw part of his hammer
to fill more dirt back into the hole....

Last night I sat down and decided to work on my novel. I wrote about three lines and
thought, "Ya know, I've never played solataire on this new laptop. I wonder if it's different than the
game on the desktop?" Thus began my long, slow journey to Procrastinationville....

As many times as I've tried to convince myself that my senses are every bit as sharp as my Lab's, she proves me wrong.
Just now she was sound asleep on the bed with me and all of a sudden, she jumped up, looked out the window and started barking. I'm
like, "Holly, there's nothing there. See?" And as I lifted the blind further I saw the water meter dude walking out of the yard. Yesterday she
did the same thing, and I said to Mr. G, "What could she be barking at? There's nothing there." He said, "Yes, there is.
There was a yellow Lab on the front porch just now." She gets me every time.

I see Brokeback Mountain, the new film about two gay cowboys is getting a lot of notice. Goddess is NOT ready for gay cowboys!!
There are some romantic fantasies that are taboo in my mind--gay cowboys being one of them.
This is going to sound strange, but It's not the sex between guys that bothers me so much as the romance.
In other words, I'd be creeped out to watch them kiss but have no problem watching them get it on.
Actually I LIKE watching them getting it on. Just like a lot of men enjoy seeing two women, I
enjoy seeing two men, and I'm sure I'm not the only woman who does.

I was reading an article on Yahoo about Canada lifting the ban on swinger's clubs.
I gotta admit Gangbang Tuesdays holds a hell of a lot more appeal to me than TGI Fridays.
But why is it that when they show swingers on tv or in articles, they're always rather...well, plain to be polite?

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