Thursday, December 08, 2005

bad boys bad boys

"Real Americans fail geography." Stephen Colbert

Lo it was on this day 24 years ago, that Goddess gave birth to a babe and wrapped her in swaddling footed p.j.'s.
Viva la labor pains!
Happy Birthday to Female Offspring #1.
(Yes, your mother is still alive, btw.)

If you're like me and you HATE it when you can't reach a real person when calling customer service, check out this site.
And when you're there, check out all the steps you have to go through when you call Dell Service.
You just know they're hoping you give up long before you get through those steps.

I heart the new Pampers Christmas ad. The commercial shows babies sleeping while Silent Night plays in the background. Simple but effective.
I love the way the baby's little mouths move when they sleep
like they're sucking on a bottle.

South Park well and truly sucks. Wednesday night's ep was about a statue of the Virgin Mary that bled...out it's ass.
It wasn't funny so much as it was....lemme see, what are the words I'm looking for? Oh yeah, totally crass.
And the other storyline was Stan's dad refusing to get help for his drinking problem after someone told him
alcoholism was a disease. The writing is not nearly as clever as it used to be. It's become preachy
via the kids, and it's OBVIOUS preaching. Nothing clever in that.

Sadamn refused to return to the courtroom the other day, citing among other reasons the fact that
he had been forced to wear the same clothes for days. Da horror! Da horror! Isn't that always the way? Deposed dictators are such pussies.
But I have to ask, ISN"T HE A FUCKING PRISONER?! Since WHEN do they get a say in whether or not they're going to attend court proceedings?
DRAG HIS SORRY ASS TO COURT. Sad fact is they're still treating him like he's in charge.

I have a lot of my Christmas shopping already completed. I bought money for several of the
mercenary offspring. I bought Male Offspring #4 some glass display cases, so he could start his
own mini twine museum. He'll put it right next to his "shrine to twine."

No wonder kids today have such unrealistic expectations. There was a chick on
tv who shelled out $200K for
her daughter's bat mitzvah. That is INSANE. That would have paid for a college
education. Instead it was spent on a fucking party.

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