Friday, September 23, 2005

you make me feel like the amazons runnin between my thighs

Carl writes: "my wife & i are having difficulty becoming pregnant. you have 16. any suggestions for us?" Well first of all, Carl, I hate to say this but no matter how hard you try, you aren't going to get pregnant, so give that whole "we" shit up right now. That having been said, what works really well for me is screaming, "IF I GET PREGNANT ONE MORE TIME I'M GONNA TO KILL MYSELF!!!" right before I have sex.Not only does it ensure that I get knocked up every time, but it also adds to the romantic ambiance.

Let the butt sex jokes begin.... Did you read about the Cardinal who broke his vow of secrecy and released his diary which described the voting process that elected the new pope? Here's an excerpt from that diary: "Dear Diary, Last night I sexed up three altar boys. They were rightously holy in more ways than one and I---" oops, wrong entry. Here goes: "Sunday, April 17: In the afternoon I took over my room at the Casa Santa Marta. I put down my bags and tried to open the blinds because the room was dark. I wasn't able to. One of my fellow brothers asked a nun working there, thinking it was a technical problem. She explained they were sealed so we could have great ass sex without anyone seeing--" whoops. Wrong entry again. Anywho, basically all it proved was that Pope Benedict was a "come from behind" win. BWAHAHAHAHA.

My webPIMP's url.....

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