Friday, August 26, 2005

i guess thats why they call it the blues

Well it was fun while it lasted, kids. I actually achieved laptop status for all of five minutes. I tried not to tell anyone or even think about it for fear of jinxing it.
Evidently I didn't try hard enough.
I purchased what I thought was a really nice laptop--and it was . I powered it up and the screen stayed black. I thought, "Ok, maybe there is no XP installed. That's not a problem. Female Offspring #1 could probably get me a CD from the University." Then I noticed there was no hard drive. I flipped over the box and noticed no RAM either. At this point, I'm still thinking it's doable. Hard drive would probably cost me about $160 and probably the same or a tad less for RAM. I can do this. I read further on the box and discovered there was no CPU--central processing unit. THEN I sat down and cried for 15 minutes cuz I knew there was no point in keeping the P.O.S. if it didn't have a CPU. Back to square one.

I love it when the neighbor's kids get the mail. They announce what everything is from the street. "MOM! You got something from WalMart and something that says "Third and Final Notice. What is that? Can I open it? Oh, and Dad got stuff too." Good thing she didn't get a vibrator in the mail.
"Mom! You got a package from Dildos-R-Us! What is that? Can I open it?"
And friends yelled at me when I said I wanted to create a muzzle for kids.
Who's dying of embarrassment NOW, people?!

I'm waiting on a package from Fed Ex. UGH. I've never had the best of luck with Fed Ex. Either they can't find trailer or my street or they can't find my state. One time they left a message in my mailbox saying I wasn't home when they stopped to leave a package for Female Offspring #1. Matter of fact, I WAS home, watching them at the neighbor's house, thinking SHE was getting a package. (Yes, I suffer from extreme package envy. I admit it.)
It's always something with Fed Ex. When I checked the tracking numbers, I see the package is now in New Jersey after leaving Virgina. I've never claimed to be a geographist (or a directionographer) but why would you go from Virginia to New Jersey if you're sending a package to Pennsylvania?
Why not come straight up through Maryland?
A hurricane's a blowin'

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