Wednesday, June 08, 2005

not how i wanted it i'm hating all of this

I clearly need to be taking lessons from the bitch. We've been having trouble with Holly the last few days because she refuses to go in her crate at night or when we're working. Considering that the other morning I found her chewing ON MY FUCKING WALL, the mutt CANNOT stay uncrated in the house all day. Mr. G called me at work yesterday morning and said, "We're gonna have to figure something out. She's not happy." I'm like, "HELLO?! I'M not happy not having a laptop but I don't see you jumping through hoops to PLEASE ME!! And I've been miserable for WEEKS, thank you very much."
It amazes me that our other two dogs were outside constantly, and yet we're afraid to let this punk stay outside by herself for five minutes when we're not home. After all the destruction, I'm thinking, let her out. If she slips her lead and goes to live with another family, well then that's for the best...at least I'll still have three walls and half a roof over my head.

I have to admit, though, Holly is the only dog I've ever owned that LOVED the snow and rain. The other day it was pouring and she was outside laying in the yard chewing her bone like she didn't have a care in the world. Mookie would have had a heart attack had so much as a drop of rain landed on her fur. I opened the window and yelled, "Holly! It's R*A*I*N*I*N*G. Get your ass out of the rain!" She looked at me as if to say, "Huh? Who are you?" Much the way she usually looks at me.

Ya know when I JOKED about steering with my elbows in my COPS article, I had no idea that people actually DO that. I was reading a survey the other day and people admitted to STEERING WITH THEIR KNEES! A guy on a motorcycle passed me just the other day and as he became almost even with my car, he extended both arms out as far as he could and stretched! I'm thinking, "ASS! Hotdog next to somebody else's car."
From the same survey, I discovered people also do the following WHILE DRIVING:
32% of drivers read AND write
29% talk on a cell phone
17% comb their hair
16% fight with other passengers
10% put on makeup
3% PUT IN CONTACT LENSES!!
After reading this I'm going to try to stay more focused myself when driving.
Often I reach over and dig in my purse with one eye
on the road. Unfortunately, accidents happen in a split second and it doesn't take much to get distracted.

For some reason, it's comical to see P.Diddy on an infomercial for an acne product. I don't know why, but it just strikes me as humorous.

A neighboring community is sponsoring an anti-drug fair. As a complement, I believe our community should sponsor a pro-drug fair. You know, just to be "fair."

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